Some personal reflections on this otherness that seems to define us... a continuous search to understand our place in this world. Nothing academic, not a researched piece, just some observations and my own feelings and thoughts on this matter.
Love,
Laura.
March 27, 2010
Curiosity has kept us moving from one place to another; a deep desire amongst the majority of us to discover, to see the unknown, to perhaps find a different world to enrich our own. It is in these perceived differences that the perennial and worn out “who are we” question becomes clearer; answers through observations serving as a mirror in which, seeing that otherness, our own being is made stronger, much more defined.
What a surprise then to find that amidst the newness of the unknown - the lack of ability to comprehend those sounds composing the “other” languages lived, the varied tastes and colors of food (and not only the type of food nurturing our body, but our mind as well), the other religious and spiritual beliefs, our diverse routines and ways to go about living - deep down we are all the same.
Of course nobody doubts that the other person existing miles away from what we call home has the same blood running through their veins, bones sustaining all the flesh and muscles carrying the weight of our bodies… yet somehow we still seem to think that we’ll find something completely new the further we go from the place we reside or come from. At first sight, perhaps this might be true. Realities which are foreign to ours sure might appear like a whole different world. However, deep down, there are more similarities to us than differences. We’re all humans longing to be loved (even if perhaps love is shown differently from place to place), people who at one point or another have had dreams and perhaps even accomplished some. We all need to belong to a greater part of society, call it State, call it ethnic group, call it trade, call it what you want. There are for sure many ways in which we differentiate ourselves by finding commonalities with a group of individuals. Part of our connecting thread though is that all of us seem to desire a sense of belonging, an identity affirmed by the others in our social group. Of course our words, our preferences, our lifestyles and beliefs differ, sometimes greatly, but more often than not, that mirror of “otherness” in which we thought we’d find ourselves shows us an image we didn’t expect to see. It shows that we are not so different after all.
The point here is that we must be willing to look beyond of differences and reach into that essence of our being, that life that connects us all to this same place. Yes, regardless of the manmade borders and relative distances, let’s not forget, we all inhabit the same place, we all sleep, we’re alive. I hope not to sound contradicting, or oblivious to the fact that our backgrounds differ in a way in which our experiences bring us different possibilities and lives. To do so would be to ignore history, privilege, power struggles and reality. What I am talking about here is a deeper sense of human nature, of being alive, of reacging deep inside us without distancing the individual from the collective to an unreasonable extent.
I don’t want to overly state the obvious here though, so I’d like to focus on my first thought. Our sense of curiosity fueling the desire to observe that otherness. The need to see ourselves and fortify our identity as we discover that mirror of otherness. There are many roles conspicuously imposed upon us and although I am speaking for more than myself here, I should be clear that this is a personal reflection on what I’ve lived and what I see around me. Each time my curiosity for the world sparks, I realize that our differences are many, but the similarities of humanity are strong. These similarities make a big world seem small, they make me value life as an abstract spark of love, pushing me to let go of any roles that have been assigned to me and that I’ve taken into my being – aware or not. I am not saying that I want to deny the need for categorization, or of some kind of labeling. I wear several with pride, others with carefully crafted hesitation , and I can think of more which I’m not completely certain fit me or will ever be part of who I perceive I am.
Some tangible examples of the above mentioned labels: this person writing now is Laura, the westerner, U.S. born half Colombian, half Italian girl –or woman? This person is the music addict who loves writing and photography, but cannot call herself a photographer because of her lack of skills. This is the feminist, regardless of the negative connotation that may carry. I can also identify as the teacher and continuous learner, for that is what I truly love to do – teach and learn. I don’t know how much I identify with being an adult, but I rationally know I am one, so in that sense there is a role that is now growing in how I perceive myself. I’ll stop now, as my point with these personal examples was not to list what I am or what I’m becoming, but rather to explore the roles we take and how we assimilate them into our lives.
Curiosity and otherness as a mirror to who we are, yet who we are is not set on stone and might not be fully defined – ever. Then until then, I say that curiosity must be forever sparked, explored, lived and embraced. The mystery of that otherness can only be savored if we value it and venture into trying to understand the diversity around us, for that, ultimately might be the richest thread connecting our being with the world and in doing so, connecting us with the infinite possibilities of who we can be.
